My (self controlled) RUINED orgasm this morning…

She was there in bed, legs spread. That LONG skirt (Princess Joanie, anyone! “Then buy me a DRESS, boy!” (She knew I liked short dresses, so guess what I bought her – – a LONG ONE!) …a nd legs spread on the bed as she caressed a man’s chest

Hairy, I believe.

His name was “Aaron”. A past friend.

But remember, all of this – and dreams in general – are often SYMBOLIC!

And anyway …. they didnt do it then. The dream proceeded, and I dont remember a lot of it to be honest, even when I woke up, but it was multi faceted, and though I kept getting woke up, I kept picking up the dregs of the dream and goin gback to sleep.

(Love it when that happens, hehe).

And finally she DID do it, I believe … I think so, or something close.

“How dare you”, I remember thinking.

In the dream, we had an argument. “How can you do this? Youre married!”

(I said it – and remember – symbolism again!)

She looked at me arrogantly and defiantly, figuratively shrugged her shoulder as if to say “THIS guy!”

Who cares!

“It’s my choice, boy, what I do with ANY man” 

And she fluffed off … 

And I felt … HUMILIATED. DEMEANED. Angry! 


And right there and then I dropped down.

And did it.

I licked her ass.

No prelims. Got straight to her rosebud!

Initially she let me do it without speaking. Ignoring me much like a man might ignore a girl sucking him until he really “feels it”.


Involuntarily, she FELT IT!

My tongue went INSIDE her lovely rosebud which I can still smell on the blankets …

(though she wasn’t there!)

And, I asked her.

“Did he have a big dick, Madam!”

And her reply?

Was one for the ages, but it happened then. I woke up – with a gigantic hard on, about to cum, without control..

In the past, this would have meant I “rubbed a little” without cumming – but the pleasure – initial burst at least would have been there.

You know how it is. Hard to control!!!!!

And with a girl next to you – oh my!

But today?

My FIRST thoughts were – I can’t cum!

And my thoughts auto switched over to somethign else, and it was like the orgasm was NEVER there – or coming in the first place!

Woke up.

Checked the blankets. Normally SOME cum would be there, either there or the sheets.

Nothing, just a bit of precum on the sheets. NOthing noticeable either.

When I stood up, a giant BLOB of cum just “fell” off my dick onto the floor. I wiped it up with a dirty “duster”. THAT ONE!

Wiped off the remnants – wasn’t a lot – with my own underwear, which I’m wearing now!

And then I took a massive leak, and that was that! It was a massive leak, and reminds me of my friend Rueben who I wrote about – who woke up with a giant hard on watching “BET” and th egirls on it, and he had to take a massive leak.

“How can I go”, he asked me. “I’m so hard”. 


We’ve all been there!

And I should have sucked him off right there and then!

But anyway, this reminds me of the sheer CONTEMPTOUS way my “wife” (in the dream) said it … and how it angered me, turned me on, and what happened?

True cuck style. I licked her ass. SHe ignored me, and then finally “felt it”!

Anyway …

Thats why I prefer SISSYGASMS over ruined orgasms, my friend.

With ruined orgasms, it’s easy to get that first blast of pleasure – and equally easy to NOT STOP before the “point of release” (not the point of first “contraction”!).

If you do so for the latter, the man feels SOME pleasure. Sure, still nothing like a real orgasm, but the initial pleasure leads to a bit more… 

But the other way?

IT’s just pure RELEASE.

That dick may or may not stay hard, but the cum has started to CUM out.

COME out!

And it does … like the 10% that did for me. That one blob!

With sissygasms, all of it would have come out.

With sissygasms, it’s also  – and I keep harping on this in the book (nice expression eh. harping. ;)).

Your COCK is NOT the”focus” here, boy! 

During a sissygasm, because of the position you’re in, it’s also a lot easier to ignore your cocks, and any thoughts OTHER than the cock IN YOU – or the fingers!

And the nipples.

True sissy style taken to another level altogether. Your cock truly becomes nothing but a tool of release.

Can be EXTREMELY Pleasurable – – but WITHOUT cock stimulation and the cock “real man” contractions!”

OR … could be like going to the doctor’s office for a prostrate check up.

Much like Sophia Bai did for me so many times, hehe.

And thats what I gotta tell you in this longish dream diary, or random “thoughts” (stream of consciousness) or what not. Have at!


Mike Watson

PS – Madam, can I suck cock for you? I often asked Madam Pearl this, and it was such a turn on! I’d LOVE to do it NOW!

PS #2 – I really should have sucked Rueben’s cock, and then let him piss all over me later. He had such a nice sexy DONG! That head, oh MY!

PPS – I finally am on the road to “full control”. Self control at that! Took me a while, but I’m getting there, hehe.

PPS #1 – I went back to sleep after the massive leak. Had more dreams, all “lovely” and unrelated. And …  I am SO HARD NOW! Like a rock! yet another benefit of BOTH sissy gasms and ruined orgasms, my friend – not to mention better HEALTH overall (ever wonder why ancient kings for one had their rosebuds prodded all the time??). And on that note one last memory. Madam Carol, her of the lovely feet, mentioned in “A complete guide to understanding dominant ladies from the mainland” (I think at the time of writing this Madam Dani is almost done translating this into SPANISH! Yay!) once asked me in wonder.

“Again! You already do two times! You want three???”

All real man orgasms those.

Funny how it works?

And yes, she was so … NICE!

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